Chasing Clare
by goldsworthyy
Summary: What happens when you love someone so much but you just can't give them everything without getting hurt? / Eclare Fluff :


**Hi guise! **

**So this is just random and i don't really like how it turned out but it took me a few hours so i decided to upload it.**

**This takes place present day and like, everything has happened that has happened**

**So enjoyy :P**

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Clare's POV

Eli was honestly everything that I could wish for. He knew how to treat me right and with all the shit going on with my once perfect family, he also knew how to make me feel better. A few months after the kiss at the Frostival we were still going strong.

Our 3 month anniversary; which if you also count the first 3 months we were together before made it our 6 month anniversary; and it was today.

I was overly happy that Eli and I were finally happy and content with each other.

We were also drama free... Besides Drama club and we felt like we were on the top.

Eli got out of school early today for a doctor's appointment so I took the time to catch up and not revolve my lunch around Eli.

"Hey guys." I said as I took a seat at the lunch table that I rarely sat at anymore. Even though I rarely sat there they all welcomed me and gave me smiles.

"Eli and yours Anniversary is tonight, right?" Jenna asked.

"Yeah..."

"You guys going to have sex finally?" Jenna asked. Boy this girl has a lot of questions.

"Jenna! You don't ask that." Alli fired back.

Even though Alli and Jenna claim to be best friends I can tell that Alli gets mad at Jenna a lot. She always speaks exactly what is on her mind and she doesn't really care who she offends in the process.

"It's okay Alli, and I don't know." I answered truthfully.

The truth was I really didn't know.

For once Saint Clare didn't know. It was weird for me.

Thank god I was saved by the bell that ended Lunch and was able to finish my day in a hurry so I could see Eli ASAP.

But before the day ended I had one thing on my mind; sex.

I never understood what Darcy meant when she said such a small word was so confusing.

I wasn't sure of my feelings for Eli. Yes, I love him but I wasn't sure if I was ready.

Honestly, I wasn't sure if he was ready.

Since we started our relationship again I tried so hard to make Eli see that I was ready. I put myself out there twice and both times he said I wasn't ready and it was all in my head and had to do with peer pressure or something - but it didn't.

I knew it didn't.

My thoughts were interrupted by the bell ringing. It was finally ready to leave this hell hole.

I'm not usually the type to hate school but I just wanted to see Eli so school was the last of my priorities.

I walked quickly to my locker, not caring who was starring and put my Physics book away and quickly locked my lock and headed to Jake's truck.

'Where is he?' I thought to myself. I told him to get here right after school.

I took my phone out of my pocket to call Jake but as soon as I turned towards to school to check to make sure he wasn't in sight I saw him walking towards the truck.

"You're late." I snapped.

"No, you were just early." Before I could say another word, he continued "Now get in the car. You have a guy dressed in black waiting for you."

I did as he said and got in the passenger side. As he started the engine I couldn't help but look at him in the corner of my eye and smirk. Gosh, I've been spending too much time with Eli that's I'm starting to act like him.

As he pulled up to Eli's I got out and thanked him. Thankfully Jake was the kind to not rat me out to our parents.

Our parents didn't mind me dating Eli again, it's just my mom still only got to know him that one time at dinner were I messed everything up and Glenn still hasn't gotten to sit down and talk to him - only the occasional 'Hello' when he's over our house.

I quickly walked up to the door like the lottery was behind it and I was just about to win. I didn't even have to knock because Eli already opened it when he saw Jake's truck pull up.

We shared our 'hellos' and Eli waved at Jake then we both watched him pull away.

"To Hotel Eli?" He said with the biggest smirk on his face.

"Lead the way." I grabbed his hand and followed him upstairs to his once cluttered getaway.

As soon as we walked in, he closed and locked the door; even though nobody else was home.

"What would you do if I just locked you in here and never let you out?" He said sarcastically with a smirk.

"Would you be in here with me?" I replied with the same tone in my voice.

We both laughed till our lips touched.

I quivered at the feeling and I could tell he felt me do it because of his reaction.

He swiftly picked me up and held my bottom as I twisted my legs behind him and he carried me to his black sheets. After he knew my body was fully on the sheets he continued to make his way on me, slightly hovering my body. Our heat together as one made the breeze coming through his open window feel like nothing.

We just laid there. He looked down at me and I looked up at him. The moment was perfect. I wouldn't want to spend my Friday any differently.

I couldn't handle it any longer. The wait was too long and he knew what he was doing to me. He loved teasing me.

He slowly started to lean down towards my lips and kept them only a centimeter apart and stopped.

'Come on, Eli.' I thought but would never actually say it out loud. I didn't want to seem like one of those clingy girlfriends that just wanted to make out, even though I was turning into one of them with him. He was just so tempting. But before I even got to make the move and kiss him, he read my mind and did it. He knew I was thinking so he surprised me.

Boy did I love his surprise kisses, even though I knew it was going to happen.

After spending a good four minutes getting lost in his kisses, everything heated up.

I arched my back in pleasure as he nipped at my neck in various places.

After a few moments of silent moaning and huffs I forced Eli to pull away.

"I'm ready, Eli." I looked into his eyes without regret.

I couldn't read his facial expression and that freaked me out. Eli was usually easier to read than anyone else I knew.

He moved himself off of me and looked at me with disappointment.

"Why don't you ever believe me?" this time I didn't look at his eyes but instead looked at a poster in his room.

"It's all peer pressure, Clare. I know you. I don't want to take away the most important thing to you because you feel pushed."

"You don't get it do you?" He seriously didn't get why I wanted to have sex with him.

"What don't I get?" Now he was easier to read - he had mystery in his eyes. He really didn't get it.

"Eli, you are the most important thing to me. After the whole divorce and my mom marrying a guy I barley know, I don't have a male to look up to in my life. Yes, I have Jake; but he doesn't count. He's my age and since I dated him before it's hard enough to live under the same roof as him. You understand me. You're the person always there to talk to me when I'm down. You are the most important thing to me, not my virginity that I'm supposed to save to marriage. I don't even believe in marriage anymore! _Heck - sometimes I don't even believe in god_."

Eli's POV

I can't believe such a thing would come out of Clare's mouth.

Of course she believed in God, she always has and always will.

"Don't say that." I lay next to her and pulled her between my legs so her back was against my chest.

"I love you, Clare; and I always will. I'm willing to wait for you. See." I picked up her left hand and traced my fingers over the words on her purity ring that read 'true love waits'. I continued "If you promised that true love was going to wait, well then, true love is going to wait."

"But I don't want it to wait, Eli! I want to experience it. Why wait till marriage if I know you're the one?" She looked up at me on the verge of tears.

She was confused.

Damn, I was confused!

"Same reason every year on Christmas you wait till Christmas morning to open your presents even though you know they were hiding in your parents' room for weeks. It's all worth the wait, Clare." I leaned into her ear and kissed her birth mark right under it.

Without even waiting for me to pull away she talked but I kept my lips hovering her ear.

"I can't wait any longer, Eli. I need you." Those words actually hurt me. She needed me, even though she said it while relating to sex I knew she meant it other ways as well.

She needed me like I needed her so long ago.

She needed me to be there for her like she was there for me.

"You have me." I whispered in her ear then pulled away just taking in her beauty.

"Then why are you so worried about me regretting it?"

"Clare, you wouldn't get it." I was about to be 100% open with my girlfriend; more open then I have ever been with her before. I continued "Everybody's first times suck. It hurts like hell and I'm scared to hurt you. I know I hurt you in the past but this is pain on another level; this is a physical pain. Honestly Clare, I'm scared. I don't want to hurt you." I saw pain in her eyes. I knew Clare very well; I could usually read her but this time... nothing.

**Nothing.**

_I, Elijah Goldsworthy, could not read Clare Edwards._

It was something that I never felt before.

I wasn't sure if she was angry at me or if she was trying to comprehend what I just told her.

"It's worth it Eli." She finally spoke.

I was going to cut her off but I let her speak. I knew whatever she was going to say would be unpredictable.

"The pain, it's worth it. You're worth it. I just want to protest my love to you and at the moment sex is the only way."

Like I said; totally unpredictable.

But it did make me feel better knowing that I was worth all the pain - I will admit that.

_And I, Elijah Goldsworthy, usually am not the type to admit things._

Clare's POV

Was I wrong? Was sex the only way to announce my love for Eli? Yes and No.

Yes, I was wrong, Sex wasn't the only way to make sure Eli knew all my feelings but at the same time, No because sex is the only way I knew he was committed.

We both knew how he felt about my religion and my purity ring but that all doesn't matter right now.

'True Love Waits.' I read to myself as I put my pinky over the engravement.

I felt him watching me but I didn't say anything.

I was out of words. Here I am getting rejected again by my boyfriend.

Again.

Wow, that word hurt.

Fuck it, I can't take it anymore.

"Here." I swiftly took my almost tattooed, purity ring off my finger and gave it to him.

"Clare..." I cut him off and continued my carefully thought out words "I can't do this anymore, Eli. You might not be physically fucking me but you're mentally right now and that hurts more than anything." I stood up and left. Just like that.

He didn't run after me. He watched me walk away from his room that I helped him clean. He watched me and didn't do anything.

I was hurt in more ways than one.

or was I wrong?

When I finally made it to my house there was an all so familiar car in the drive way.

Not my moms.

Not Jake's.

Not Glen's.

But **his**.

He chased after me.

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**yeahhh soooo,**

**review? I want to start uploading more but i want to make sure i have some dedicated readers :)**


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